The privilege of being single

Tomorrow Valentine shall be upon us again with its usual consequences. Smug arrogant married women or those in long term relationships will look at single women condescendingly and sigh
" oh dear ! You are still alone ? no rose or candy for you yet ? "
Let me explain what happens when you are a single woman.
ALL YOUR OPTIONS ARE OPEN !
The sky is the limit. You want to get laid, you seduce someone and you get laid. You don't want to get laid, you don't. You need not do stuff against your will for fear of losing him. Being single means being totally free, completely in charge of your life. So what if you don't get one yearly attention on that day ? You can get plenty attentions any other day of the year. Don't you find it terribly unspontaneous to know that your man has to be nice to you that very day for the sake of tradition ? How boring is that ? What about the rest of the year ? Does your man help you rearing the kids ? Does he do his share of housework ? Does he get the trash out and fold the clean laundry ? Does he comfort you when you don't feel good ? Does he give you orgasms regularly ?
In other words.... does your man treats you well all year or does he make a fake effort only on Valentine day ?
There you have it. To all my friends and readers who are single for one reason or another I will say this : It is ok to be single on Valentine day !
Like me, make a point of not accepting a date on that day and claim the privilege of being free.
If Valentine is the celebration of love. lets remember that there are several kinds of love. Send Valentine greetings to your sexfriends, to your ex spouses if you are still friends, text valentines messages to your grown kids, to your friends, to people you admire or appreciate in a non sexual way.
Above all, have fun. Treat yourself. I am treating myself to a movie, a chocolate dessert and a comedic dvd at home later. I usually get lots of texts from family and friends and a few past and current lovers, but it will be ok whether I do or not. I am going to celebrate being alive, well and free.

Got laid big time this morning ! Yay

Ever since the year started I didnt like any of those who made a pass at me and we all know I would rather have no sex that bad sex or average sex. Therefore I had not  had any yet ....However....... this morning my blackberry beeped at 7am with a text from my favourite shag buddy Igor.
-Wanna have breakfast ?
Breakfast ? I thought, does he really think I am getting out of my fluffy warm bed just to have breakfast ? Whatever.
My blackberry beeped again.
-I wanna eat you out, thats what I am having for breakfast, what do you want  to eat ?
Wow ! Now he is talking !
Within ten minutes I jumped out of bed, brushed my teeth while texting him
-YES YES YES  NOW !!!
I showered , combed my hair, fluffed my pillows, threw a gorgeous red spread on my messy bed, put some condoms next to the pillows and lit up a couple of candles. When I opened the door to a very horny Igor he opened his arms and I just had to jump into them while wrapping my legs around his thorax. After putting me down,  Igor threw his clothes all over the corridor and showed me his magnificient hard on before stuffing it in my mouth. This is something I would never accept of a one night stand but Igor and I have been sexfriends for a number of years therefore that is ok with me. Getting off my knees I grabbed his manhood by the hand and led him to my bedroom. The sun was not up yet, red candles were shining and the scent of my new Chanel perfume was driving him absolutely crazy. Igor pushed me down on the bed and kissed my whole body up and down while I was already drowning in pleasure. That man sure knows his way around my body.
By the time we got to kissing passionately his body was dancing on mine and something slipped in somewhere without wearing a coat.
tss tss tss !
For a brief moment I felt such ecstasy that I screamed his name and almost forgot mine. Every cell in my being just lit up in a thousands little fires. He gave in for a couple of minute and asked if I took the pill, I thought about it for a minute and lied. Igor withdrew immediately and put a condom on so that he could get back inside quickly.
-You know , he whispered sexily, if you and I start going bareback we wont be able to stop and we might feel a little too good and we might get into trouble, you know ?
I know.
I know only too well, for  the last time I allowed  myself to feel a "little too good " I started losing control, I do know, and I refuse to have another Martin situation. Not wanting to go into details I just panted that he was right , that this would be wrong and would he shut up and fuck me now pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaase.
The sex that ensued was absolutely torrid , wild but also slow, sexy, sensuous, sensual, with moments of madness. I felt so high that I avoided looking into his eyes and he into mine. Later on, after he went to work, I realised that making love without protection to someone you like is not only a health hazard for obvious reasons, it is also an emotional hazard for it makes the sexual connection so much stronger, it gives it a different meaning, takes it to a much higher level, add some sexy stares and post sex cuddles into the mix and you can be sure to lose control of the situation. This is how we lose our power, this is how men get to us. I really dont want to go trough that ordeal again so I shall carry on having glorious sex the way I like it, protecting my health and my heart with condoms.
Beautiful, magical sensation though.....
Check my ebook here

the passion of a smart and classy black man

Valentin and I had met at the movies while queing up for the bathroom. I had noticed this tall, casually elegant ,  well spoken black man as he chatted to some friends in the pop corn queue and couldnt resist glancing sexily at him. It has been over a year since I last enjoyed chocolate love and Im practically having withdrawal syndroms. The problem being I have seduced most black hotties in town except for the married ones, the gay ones , the thugs, and the ones I didnt fancy. I could of course have had a roll in the hay with Mike but he just is too unreliable and I keep turning him down when he tries asking me out again. I had almost given up when this beautiful ebony viril quintessence  of manhood cought my attention. Since I was at the movies with friends I didnt dare go chat him up openly but when I saw him waiting by the bathroom , I just had to bat my eyelids at him and ask how he liked the new James Bond. He happened to find skyfall to be the best of the 23 Bond movies, mmm a man who thinks like me. As the time came to return to our seats I just gave him my card and whispered seductively that we might go out for a drink and talk some more about James Bond or something, one evening. Valentin smiled cheekily and took my card without a word.
Did that mean yes ? no ? maybe ? I dont know ?
grrrr the suspense was killing me.
When he did call the following week I almost did cartwheels. We went out for drinks a couple of times, never aproaching the subject of sex. Slow worker maybe ?
Having had enough of that tension, I decided the third date would be a coffee at my place. When Valentin arrived, ten minutes too early, I had butterflies in my stomach, I wore a short denim skirt with an elegant white shirt and black high heels, it said " sexy but not slutty, elegant but horny".
After we had coffee and talked about foreign politics for ever, he also happens to be very articulate, I asked why he was here, he wiggled out of it with a philosophical joke but I looked him in the eye and declared that I had stocked on condoms and that if it ever occured to him to make love , I might be opened to it. While I said this , I took a huge black hand and rested it on my thigh, cupping his face with my hands. And the magic happened !
Woop woop woop ! I cant believe I made it so long without a black man in my bed ! The passion of his love making was overwelming, the gentleness of his gestures was almost caring. Whenever I said I didnt like this or that I loved that, Valentine immediately changed what he was doing till I was purring again.
A man can listen ? This one sure can.
At some point he stared into my eyes and asked when my last fuck had taken place, since this wasnt the moment to argue I just said end of january, my last time with M. Why would he ask me that ?
He did fish for compliments that he really deserved. I hadnt had that much fun in a long time. What I liked the most about him is that he made sure I came before he did. It was not a competition to him, he just wanted to make sure he was making me feel as good as he felt. Impressive , right ?
When we were done, we just cuddled and talked. He seems to ask a lot of questions but he does it in a very smart way, it doesnt feel like a third degree. However I had to giggle when he asked whom was the better lover between him and my last bf. How do you compare ? they are both brilliant in different ways. I just said each man is unique and has something wonderful to offer, he seemed to accept that. I look forward to my next hot chocolate love session, yum yum !

on fire !

after a stressful day at work I was looking forward to a long shower and curling up on the sofa with my cat in front of a funny movie BUT my favourite shagbuddy of all time rang to say he had had an awful day and wanted to unleash all his sexual energy on me. Decisions, decisions. What shall I do ?
Long shower and mind numbing tv OR hot hot hot sex with Igor ?
What would you have chosen ?
I jumped into a pale green kimono after a quick shower, fed my darling cat and put on some Marvin Gaye music.
As soon as I opened the door to Igor on fire , I knew I had chosen wisely. He swept me off my feet, ripped my kimono off my body and kissed me with a hunger I had seldom tasted on him. Igor and I stumbled in my living room and made out heavily on the dining table. What is it with guys and dining tables anyway ? If this piece of furniture could speak.....
Sex with Igor was slow and sexy, then wild and out of control, then gentle, then crazy again. Just what I needed, 3 orgasms in an hour , last one happened at the same time as Igor's ! It had been many months since I had come as intensely. Afterwards we stepped out of the shower and talked about how fantastic this primal sensation of catching fire at the same time had been. It felt as though we were not people but just elements of nature completely atuned to the univers but not knowing our names or where we were. We became, for a short moment, pure energy. Im surprised Igor went through the same at the moment I did, he reckons it could happen because we actually trust each other sexually so this is what we can achieve even if we are not in love romantically. See ? Thats exactly why Igor is my favourite of all time. He doesnt pretend to be in love nor to want more. He is very clear about what we are doing together. Why oh why arnt all men just like Igor ? Pure pleasure and no bullshit.

You dont need to be in love to have orgasms !

At last !  My favourite shagbuddy Igor and I had a fabulous romp last night. I had turned Igor down  a few times lately but last night, I was in the mood and very much delighted when he accepted to come over after my call. Igor walked in, swept me off my feet, gave me big slopery kisses while taking his shirt off. Undressing a guy in my hall,  seconds after he walks in , is so much fun to me !
We stumbled all the way to my bedroom while kissing, fell on the bed half dressed and fireworks were on. Igor was on fire last night.  He didnt bother say that he had missed me and neither did I. None of those hypocrital stuff, Igor knows I dont go for time wasting lies and banalities.  We just focused on giving each other a good time or should I say a really really great time. After nearly two hours of mind blowing sex and a couple of orgasms, Igor and I just fell back on my pillows to catch our breath. As hot Igor was spooning me,  I was basquing in the aftermath of  coming so hard when I remembered how Martin and I use to lie down and look at each other lovingly,  post sex, I was really annoyed at the thought and pushed it away.  When Igor went back home , we hugged and said thank you for a magnificient screw, I remembered how Martin and I used to french kiss goodnight endlessly before he would leave. This time I embraced the thought and after Igor left, with a happy I-just-had-a-great-fuck- look on his face, I decided to agknowledge that what had happened before had happened and that was fine. Now when  I do compare, I do accept that it is better with feelings but the price is too high, Sure Igor and I did not lock onto each other and kiss lovingly for hours but we did give each other orgasms and when he left I felt good about myself. I enjoyed a long shower, had a hot chocolate, cuddled up with my cat and slept like a baby. I did not wonder when I would see him again, I didnt text him, I didnt relive each moment with him, Nothing at all. Imediate satisfaction without regrets nor consequences. The kind of sex I love ! YAY ! That's how its gonna be again from now on.
To those who still dont understand what im doing, I have one answer : You dont need to be in love  with whom you sleep with to have an orgasm ! or two !