Cheating emotionally is still cheating !

Last night I had an unpleasant surprise. My favourite friend with benefits with whom I have this love-hate, on-off thing told me that he met someone while on hollidays abroad. He insists he did not sleep with her because he wanted to end our connection first. In his mind, he did not cheat because no sex was had, but I do say he did cheat because he has develloped strong feelings for the slut in only a week. How did this even happen ? We had a hot night before he left, he rang when he returned but for some reasons I didnt pick up. My little inner voice told me that he had met someone. I did not think of him all week as I got extremely busy and on friday night he texted again. My little inner voice told me to ignore him and I did. Last night I was getting ready to go to a friend's birthday party when he texted and this time I didnt listen to my inner voice. We texted back and forth, wished me fun at the party while he was going to get drunk at a concert. I asked if he wanted to meet later and he texted NO.   This is not his text manner at all but I decided he wasnt gonna spoil my fun and I went to that party. I was home around midnight still high on the great time I had when he texted to ask if I were still awake. I texted yes back and did my pre bed routine, brush my teeth, wash my face, cuddle with my cat, he texted 30 minutes later, and now ?
after another half hour he asked if he could come to see me. I was tired but someting told me I needeed to know what he wanted so urgently. He arrived dressed quite elegently, not his style at all. I could smell some beer and red wine on his breath and wondered why he had not done his usual considerate thing to chew mints before coming to me. We talked about his holls and my week and as usual we kissed and kissed and kissed till we melted together in fabulous sex, gazing at each others eyes, playing with my hair and kissing some more, the magic made an appearance. BUT.
After 15 minutes he was all done and pulled me into a cuddle. I still didnt understand he was getting ready to stub me in the back again. Silly me.
- I could have slept with a couple of women in Teneriffe but I did not. I did not cheat on you.
-Aha, and ?
-I wouldnt do that, I have never cheated on you.
-cool, and ?
We kissed some more and in the middle of a kiss goodnight he said :
-I met someone in Teneriffe.
I stoped kissing and steped back against a pillow.
-Did you screw her ?
-No of course not ! We only hanged out at the airport and talked.
-Then why are we talking about this ? Nothing happened right ?
-I really like her, in fact I want to live with her and start a familly.
-What ?
-I cant stop thinking about her, at night I just lay and wonder how she is doing ?
-You just squeezed your dick out of my body ten minutes ago, we are still wet and sweating in my bed and you lay on my pillows saying at night you will think of another woman ? HELLOOOOOOOO
What is wrong with you ? Are you retarded ?
-But I am just telling you the truth, I didnt want you to hear it from someone else. I like you enough to do this face to face instead of texting it.
Was the idiot wanting a medal ?
-OMG you are breaking up with me ! again. in my bed again, and post sex again ! Why did you sleep with me tonight when you knew you came to say its over ?
I still cannot believe he said what I heard him say.
-I really like you and I love to have sex with you. I just had to have you again. I knew that if I had told you before, you never would have given me your body one last time and I really needed to feel you again.  I took what I wanted, that's all, and yes I am a selfish asshole.
Even now those words havent sunk in. Has he lost his mind or was he always a cold calcuting S.O.B ?
-Since this is gonna be our last conversation and I need no longer be diplomatic with you let me ask you a few questions.
I asked him questions that had been on my mind about why he had said this or done that at such and such occasion and he answered every one of them. The results of this is, we were getting much too close for comfort and each time he did or said something bitchy , he was protecting himself from loving me. He went there to think about his situation with me and thats when he met this other person. He realised our age difference will begin to matter with time and I wont be able to give him children or be around in ten or twenty years as his woman. He didnt know what were. He is certain I love him and feels frustrated that I never said it, he knows that from the way we looked at each other when we have sex. And it is best to end things now before it is too late.

Ladies , I dont know about about you but I have hardly ever heard so much nonsense all at once.

At the end I confessed that I was starting to devellop some feelings and that it was going to be easier now that he was out of my life. He was astounded.
He was seriously starting to flirt with me but I was feeling like vomiting. Dude ! break up with me or dont break up with me but stop trying to get into my pants ! This body is no longer your play area.
At 4 am I asked him to leave and he was all charming and flirty again.
I thanked him for all the good time he had given me over 15 months and told him to please get thefuck out. He tried to kiss me at the door but kissed my hand instead. What a pity ! I had really liked him in bed.
There you go, lesson learned. I will never let another man anywhere near my heart again.
I have no regrets for this has been a truely beautiful connection and it has serve an important purpose, I did not know I coul still feel those things.... It was worse it.

Am I hurt ? My pride is.
Do I feel weird ? Yeah I feel so stupid for allowing things that didnt belong to a sex friendship.
Do I have  any regrets ? None.