Clumsy Dylan

Dylan  is not my type of man at all.

He is white, short, shy,  Albanian, not circumcised, 30 years old, 19 years younger than myself,  nowhere near my type of man.. However he made me laugh so hard when we were both queuing up in a shop that l looked at him differently and wondered  what he would be like in the throws of passion.

Next time l run into him l cheekily hit on him, he was very surprised and asked me out for coffee, l cheekily answered l dont drink coffee, how bout a shag ? He went bright red and litterally run away, then came back and asked if l meant that. I gave him my adress and we decided to meet at 5 pm.

When he turned up, late, he seemed scared, said he was married and had never cheated on his wife, which is fine because i dont want to get involved anyway.
 So l suggested he just drink his coffee and leave because nothing would ever happen that he wouldnt want.
Instead he felt instantly relaxed and french kissed  me passionately.
For a man who had never cheated before, he sure knew what he was doing and we went quite far that evening. We parted on a french kiss, confidant that was a nice experience with no impact of any kind.


I didnt see Dylan for weeks after that because of the Xmas break and some important things going on in my life too. When l did see him again, in the shop, he was behaving very strangely, first he was sweet, saying he had worried about me not beeing around at all, awwwww.
Then he switched to a perv saying he dreamt of threesoming with me (what ?) and have i tried anal sex (yuck !) and making all sorts of weird sexual innuendos, and then  he announces that his wife is 4 months pregnant so he needs to be a good boy now !(yo buddy you really hadnt notice your wife was pregnant a few weeks ago  !). I must have looked disgusted  because he started to apologise , saying he is not a perv and and and. Just as i relaxed he goes into dirty old man mode again ! WTF !


Either the dude has MPD or he got a taste of something he likes so much that he is like a kid locked in a candy store, wanting it all at once but Dylan  cannot control his impulses. For me it is a done deal, there is no more where this came from. For him, its like a fantasy he feeds on, when he sees me he just comes over and tell me he cant stop thinking of my mouth and has to work hard to keep his mind of me ! then he takes a step back and try to be a funny guy again then he acts weird again. Could he be more unsecure ? more clumsy ?
What he does is not even sexy anyomore and i wonder if maybe l should feel insulted at some point.
In fact I decided to tell the bozo never to hit on me again unless he is prepared to go all the way, l hate teases!